Thanks for the help all
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Ive seen this problem come up so many times between both my friends and myself and I've never found a good solution to it haha. I would say though that if you feel that strongly about it, you should go with your gut feeling and ask her out. The worst that could happen is that she says no, and things are a little awkward between the two of you for a little bit. However, if you don't ask her out, you'll never know what could've happened and I think thats a lot worse.
Course-Notes.Org Administrator If you have any questions, comments, suggestions, complaints, rants, raves, random thoughts, etc etc- feel free to direct them at me :)
Umm...If i am her, i would be a little bit creep out, b/c this guy (you) is everywhere...I"m sorry...but i'm just being honest. I think you should first try to have some third party involved. HAve your friends talk to her about stuff and ask her what she feels about you or make friend with her friends just so you can get an idea of how she feels about you first, then you can decide if it's the right time to tell her how you feel.
CoURTeSEY08 wrote:Umm...If i am her, i would be a little bit creep out, b/c this guy (you) is everywhere...I"m sorry...but i'm just being honest. I think you should first try to have some third party involved. HAve your friends talk to her about stuff and ask her what she feels about you or make friend with her friends just so you can get an idea of how she feels about you first, then you can decide if it's the right time to tell her how you feel.
that is why I was so hesitant to ask her out in past years, because she might have thought of me as creepy. however, now I have been in her clubs for the past 4 or so years which makes me a regular in them. You also said to make friends with her, but I think I already stated that we have a pretty good friendship as it is. We do alot of things together from parties to community service. also, her best friends are basically my best friends at this point. (One more reason im hesitant is because if her and I become awkward I dont want to lose the friendship I made with her friends)
I think this might have labled me as creepy 3 years ago if I just suddenly started to surround her with her friends and clubs but I cant imagine that this is a oribkem after her being used to seeing me for the past 4 years in activities.
While I agree with Chris that there never is a straight answer to this situation i think that if you really want to ask her out, you should go for it! And what you said about if you and her become awkward that you dont want to lose the friendship you have with her friends- just coming from my experiences when having the same friends as a boyfriend, if you guys are really friends then they still will be friends with you and the awkward phase (if she says no or if you get together and heaven forbid it doesnt work) wont last very long. And who knows, i was and still am in most of my BF's clubs and ect. and we were friends first and we've been together for almost a year and are still going strong- so taking a chance sometimes is an amazing thing...just food for thought
"Its not easy to be a poet here. Yet I sing. We Sing' - The Exhonerated
lmcontaldi wrote:
......I think this might have labled me as creepy 3 years ago if I just suddenly started to surround her with her friends and clubs but I cant imagine that this is a oribkem after her being used to seeing me for the past 4 years in activities.
I agree, I would've labeled you as a creep 3 years ago :p but if you guys are good friends now and her friends are your friends and viceversa, then I think its way past the creep stage and I guess you did a good job of it not overdoing it.
I have to say though if you've liked this girl for 3 years straight and you don't do anything about it, then thats kind of a waste of three years. Either you really like this girl (and you should definitely make a move) or you should go out and try to meet some other girls with similar interests. You're still young, you don't know exactly what you want, sometimes you think a girl that you're friends with would be a perfect match for you but then once you get into a relationship with her, you realize that its completely different and its not gonna work out and you were better off as friends.
Just some food for thought :)
Course-Notes.Org Administrator If you have any questions, comments, suggestions, complaints, rants, raves, random thoughts, etc etc- feel free to direct them at me :)
go ahead ask her out if you feel that both of you are ready. ANd you should also tell her that no matter what, if she have feelings for you or not, you guys still are going to be good friends.
Thanks for the advice all! :D