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When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.
The original draft of The Lord of the Rings featured Chuck Norris instead of Frodo Baggins. It was only 5 pages long, as Chuck roundhouse-kicked Sauron’s ass halfway through the first chapter.
If, by some incredible space-time paradox, Chuck Norris would ever fight himself, he'd win. Period.
Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
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Rofl, Hi-larous!
I have heard SO many of these things......and these are some of the best yet!
The hardest thing about riding horses is the ground
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[=1]Made by moi^:D[/